Sharon Ehrlich: You’re tuning in to a live recording of the Living While Leading Podcast. This episode explores how high-performing women can overcome imposter syndrome and lead with impact.
Listen to the complete discussion and learn effective strategies to reframe your thinking around the imposter syndrome phenomenon to be more confident and stand in your power.
Don’t miss out on the full transcript for this episode. Discover other resources for women leaders at https://livingwhileleading.com/53.
You’re listening to Living While Leading with your host, Sharon Ehrlich, where I support high-performing professional women in building confidence, taking control of their careers and lives, and leading with purpose and impact.
Hello and welcome everybody, to the Living While Leading podcast.
My name is Sharon Ehrlich, and I’m an executive coach for high-performing professional women. I support them in building confidence, taking control of their careers, and leading with impact.
This show is something that I’ve created to deal with a crisis that I had when I was very young in my career. That crisis was that I did not have a lot of exposure to women executives and thought leaders.
So, I created this show where I invite people to come and share their wisdom on a very specific topic. I’m really delighted to share with you that I have a wonderful guest.
Alex Gaudiani is the Vice President of Global Marketing for the Cardiac Surgery Operating Unit at Medtronic, the largest med-tech company in the world.
She has 15 years of experience in healthcare technology. She’s passionate about serving clinicians and patients and deeply dedicated to her people. Energized by moving with speed and innovative thinking and motivated by delivering results, she’s been recognized as a people first leader, focused on effective and efficient teams and championing diversity, inclusion, and equity.
Alex received her BA from Harvard and an MBA from UCLA Anderson School of Management. She and her wife live in Minneapolis, Minnesota, with their three children.
Alex is a champion of women in business and an LGBTQ advocate. I just said a lot about you, but I’m sure I didn’t say everything. Alex, welcome. Please share something else that I missed that I think our guests might be interested in hearing from you.
Alex Gaudiani: Wonderful. Sharon, thank you so much for the kind introduction. It’s an honor to be able to join you today. Good morning, good afternoon, good evening.
For those of you who are online, wherever you are in the world, I’m excited about this conversation. There’s not much more to intro Sharon, but it might be fun to share with the audience.
Even though this podcast is not about networking, I think the way you and I met is worth sharing. It’s a fun story. We had our first meeting in Vienna at a conference, and you kindly requested time with me. We just completely hit it off in the short 30 minutes we had together.
Ever since then, we’ve kept in touch, and you kindly invited me to this. It’s just another example of women supporting each other, lifting each other up, and building our network together. So, it’s wonderful to be here, and thank you again for the invitation.
Sharon Ehrlich: By the way, where are you tuning in from, Alex?
Alex Gaudiani: So, I am in Minneapolis right now. However, for those of you who are in the US, you know that Hurricane Debbie in Florida is going on or was.
I got out of Florida by the skin of my teeth on Sunday to be able to go to Vermont for the last two days. Last night, I had a bit of a plane, train, and automobiles journey getting back home, and I got home about 03:00 a.m. last night. So I am gratefully in Minneapolis, back with my family, and being able to see my children. But it was, it’s been a fun five days of travel, I’d say, well.
Sharon Ehrlich: I appreciate you being here, given the fact that you got home at 03:00 in the morning. Normally, I would be hosting this show from Vienna, but I’m actually visiting my family, and I’m on the Jersey shore, so I’m in the United States with you, but in a different time zone.
We’re going to get started with the conversation now. Alex, the topic of our discussion today is how high-achieving women can conquer imposter syndrome and make an impact.
The topic of imposter syndrome is very interesting because it’s usually framed in a way that it’s wrong with women. You and I both understand that that is not really the case. So, I’d just like to pick your brain a bit and ask you, what do you think are some of the cultural and societal factors contributing to imposter syndrome, particularly for women?
Alex Gaudiani: In leadership roles, for those audience members, as we know, imposter syndrome is basically when we feel like we don’t deserve what we do deserve.
And that’s, that is something that I think plagues women a bit throughout our careers. And you’re right, Sharon, that there are some societal and cultural elements, at least in the US, that. But I’m sure all over the world impacts that in various ways.
There’s this conversation that I’ve had so many times with mentees and, honestly, peers and mentors on how to manage it for myself in women being labeled as “too,” you’re “too” this, or you “too” that. Don’t be “too” this or don’t be “too” that.
So, we are very much asked to walk a tightrope that is practically impossible to achieve at every moment. As a result of teetering along that tightrope throughout our careers, we start second-guessing ourselves.
There are likely moments where we’ll feel really confident, like we achieved that tightrope walk, and there are moments where we feel like we fell off the rope and missed. But it’s just an impossible expectation. I think that that’s one thing, a cultural and societal element.
Another element is, you know, I feel like oftentimes where we can be raised, not always, but we can be raised to have deference to other people, to give other people credit. I don’t think that’s a bad thing.
I think what makes women particularly strong leaders is recognizing the authentic way to understand your team’s achievements, how to discuss them, and how to promote them in the right settings, particularly in big corporations that you and I are familiar with.
Sharon, that said, there’s a balance, I think, of when you put your team in front and when you put yourself in front, there’s just. We’ve just got to figure out our own authentic balance for that.
But that societal element of being sort of having deference to others, putting other people in front of us all the time. We do this as parents, too. I think a lot where you sort of put your, like whether you put your children first, your spouse first, your work first, no matter what you put first, you’re last.
So, at the end of the day, there’s sort of this “everyone’s more important than you are” at every moment. And that’s something that we, as women, I think, as leaders, have to navigate through when we’re in the working world to make sure that we balance that societal and cultural element of who we are, leverage it, optimize it, perhaps understand it, and be aware of it so you can use it positively and productively and confidently.
Also, though you should know when to combat it, it does not affect your confidence.
Sharon Ehrlich: I am glad that you said that, Alex, because I work on this with many of my clients, who, as I mentioned in the opening, are high-performing executive women.
Oftentimes, we have to spend time undoing some of the cultural and societal expectations of women, silencing ourselves so that others’ voices can be heard.
And sometimes, like you said, you can check yourself, and you’re able to undo this yourself. And other times, you need somebody like a coach, like me, or somebody else, a mentor, or whomever to sort of get you to own your power, right?
Because we all have it. Sometimes, we just have to dig a little bit deeper to recognize that we have it, that we own it, and that we sometimes need to put ourselves before everyone else.
And that’s not a bad thing. It’s not a bad thing to do. I’d like to talk a little bit about your upbringing and your early career. Can you share a little bit about the experiences that shaped your self-perception as you moved through the world, particularly as you elevated to higher levels of the corporate hierarchy?
Alex Gaudiani: I grew up in California, actually in Palo Alto, but before the Internet existed. So it was a little bit different back then and just a little bit of a different culture.
My mother is an incredibly accomplished woman, and my father is a cardiac surgeon. So, it’s fun that I found myself in the space that I grew up in—now at Medtronic.
They really impressed upon me two things: just work hard and serve others. That’s truly, particularly what they would say at the dinner table when we would get together. I have two older sisters, and we don’t care what you guys do with your lives, but you have to serve other people and give back in some way, and you’ve got to work for it.
I really appreciated them doing that because I grew up privileged, having grown up with a physician as a father and an accomplished mother in business. I did. And yet they still impressed upon me that it takes deep, hard work to get what you want and to understand how to get there.
The second thing that really impacted my self-perception is that I played soccer competitively and in college, and that truly gave me three elements that I still bring with me today in my work.
One is an appreciation for teamwork. In soccer, you’ve got eleven people on the field. The goal is to win the game. The goal is not to have the ball to yourself the whole time. How do you do that? How do you get in the right position?
You could touch the ball three times in a 90-minute game, but you played all those 90 minutes perfectly because your positioning, and your movements, allowed other people to be successful in the moment, score the goal, but also, when you get the ball, do something with it, take action, make something happen, be confident with it.
Similarly to what we were just discussing before, you know when to put people in front of you, but know when to step in front and have that confident position at the same time; there’s an element of accountability to do what you say you’re going to do.
If you tell your teammate you’re going to be in a spot on the field when you say you’re going to do it, you better be there and do it. That kind of accountability has also helped me through.
And then the commitment to win. The goal of games is to win. We got to have fun, you know, we got to play well and enjoy each other, but we got to win.
I think that those three elements, in addition to having that humble approach to serving others, all of this hard work, all of this commitment to winning, the teamwork, and the accountability, are in the service of helping someone feel better and have a better life.
Combining those two things has been foundational to who I am and how I’ve pulled into my career. So that self-perception, to your point, is that you’re sort of impressed by your parents. To be humble just to serve others, to work for it, but to serve others and create your whole career around it.
And then an element of the sports piece where it builds a bit of confidence in how you shape yourself within a team, how you take credit, how you give credit, and ultimately how you deliver a result.
Sharon Ehrlich: When we talk about leadership, we often have to discuss what it means to put yourself and other people at the forefront.
I often see this with my coaching clients; they are concerned about being exposed as frauds. This is almost the definition of imposter syndrome. They are completely accomplished, with degrees and certifications. As you said, they’ve put their heads down and done the work.
On the other hand, they feel like they’re somehow going to be exposed as fraud, which holds them back from reaching their greatness. So, I’d like to ask you a question. It’s probably going to be a bit personal. Could you share a moment where you felt the weight of imposter syndrome and what that was like for you?
Alex Gaudiani: I mean, yesterday. It happens all the time. For me, at least, it’s not as binary as I have it or I don’t. It’s just when it pokes itself into my brain.
Every day, I guess what I’ve learned over my career. And frankly, the value that you bring, Sharon, is so great because I think I’ve had some pretty transformational moments in my development working as a coach. I’ve worked with two coaches and they’ve kind of come into my life at a moment when it was really useful. So, the impact of a coach is incredibly important and should not be underestimated.
One of the things that I have learned over time is the most important person to know is yourself. Particularly in a big corporation like Medtronic, it also applies to being in a smaller organization.
But being in a big corporate organization, we talk a lot about influence management, navigating our matrix, and things like that. My number one suggestion to people is that you can network your way around the world, but the most important person to know is you.
The reason is that if you truly take the time, whether it’s through working with a coach or 360 feedback, I particularly love the Strengths Finder 2.0 test. Focusing on my strengths versus my weaknesses was a little transformational for me at the beginning of my career, which helped me battle imposter syndrome.
I feel at this point, I’m always learning. We’re all always learning, but I have a solid foundational understanding of who I am. And so, as a result, in moments like yesterday when the imposter syndrome knocks at your door, you can center yourself a little bit more and block it out or mitigate the risk of it becoming a little bit bigger in your brain.
So, these things happen when huge achievements are achieved, and maybe, you’re not quite sure how much to take credit for it yourself versus your team or getting a little nervous about talking about your accomplishments.
For example, I just met with an XYZ physician. We had a wonderful conversation. I think we reached a point where we want to do a trial with our portfolio, and it is so important to be able to take credit for it.
And I think what you mentioned around your clients that I’ve experienced myself, and yet something, a kind of second lesson learned that I’ve had is adding value. I think where imposter syndrome can start a lot for some is when you become a people manager because all of a sudden, your value is no longer your own.
Your value is no longer the work that you do. It’s the work that you lead. I think one can sometimes question ourselves when we become people leaders: what’s my value here?
If I’m not doing the work, I’m leading the work. How am I adding value? So, the accomplishments of your team, you’re suddenly thinking to yourself, should I take credit for this, or should I give it all to the person who actually did the work?
So, this idea of transitioning, your definition of how you add value, perhaps being vulnerable enough to ask your team, how can I add value to you as your leader? What will make you feel confident, comfortable, engaged, excited, and motivated to get your work done fast and well? How can I help you do that?
So, vulnerability, humility, and engagement with your team can help you define your new value as a leader versus a doer. That element, I think, really resonates with me, with how you’ve talked with your clients. I went through it myself. Those are two ways that I’ve found an opportunity to combat it.
Sharon Ehrlich: I’d like to just double click on this a little bit because when you talked about humility, this is culturally, and I’m speaking in Western cultures, women are not looked on very favorably when they talk about their achievements as opposed to men.
Of course, I’m generalizing here, but that is the fact. And so, there is a special balance that one has to have with balancing confidence with humility, and that has to be navigated in a very specific way, particularly when you’re in a high-pressure environment, which I’m sure you work in. Do you have any thoughts on how to maintain this balance?
Alex Gaudiani: I would propose that the challenge around finding that balance is not necessarily female-specific, but what I think is, is that the sort of the amplitude of our ability to oscillate and sort of achieve or not achieve that sort of to this or to that. Our amplitude is much smaller than a man’s.
I think there’s a little bit more standard deviation allowance for a man than a woman. So, it’s not necessarily that the challenge is female only. It’s just we’ve got a smaller window to operate in, from my perspective, culturally.
I’ve also considered this in several ways. First, it has to be authentic. My personal opinion is that no matter if you know someone or not, you could be a complete stranger. We humans can sense when someone is not being authentic. We just sense it.
There’s something about us, our sixth sense, that tells us that an authentic approach to being humble, confident, and sometimes even lacking confidence can be considered inauthentic because one thinks to oneself, well, you’re a confident person, but you’re not being confident.
Now, why is that? I’ve learned a little bit that if I redefine it for a moment, perhaps it will help your listeners think about it differently for themselves. Perhaps it’s not necessarily the binary dichotomy between whether you are confident or humble. Or how do you draw that perfect line between the two of them?
I might suggest that it’s confidence and confidence. For example, we can and should feel empowered to be confident, out front, to be a leader, to be out front and representative of your team, to make statements, to make decisions, and to be confident.
To be in the back, to watch, to be the wind at someone else’s back, to promote them around a table that they’re not at. Another example might be the confidence to trust your gut because it’s built off of years of experience. Don’t not trust your gut. And yet there’s a little bit of risk for that.
So, it’s confidence to trust your gut and confidence to admit when you made a mistake, which is a critical part of integrity, trust, and just personal growth. In my opinion. I might suggest people think about it like, look in the mirror, do that self-evaluation, know yourself, find your authenticity and your own approach, and then perhaps apply this framework of not how can I be both humble and confident, but how can you be confident and confident?
It’s just a matter of being confident in being out front and then being confident in stepping away and giving someone else the credit. So, that’s just a different way to think about it.
Sharon Ehrlich: I’d like to talk a little bit about mentors and role models. What role did any of them play in overcoming doubt? You mentioned that you had had coaches in two particular phases of your life. So, I’m assuming that they’re professional relationships. But what about mentors and sponsors?
Alex Gaudiani: I’m proud and privileged to be able to say that, as a member of the LGBTQ+ community and in my role at Medtronic, I do click the box for a couple of firsts for us at Medtronic.
However, what I didn’t click a box on at first is incredible, powerful female leaders. Medtronic has a lot of them, and what a proud thing to be able to say. I have benefited from the mentorship of both women and men leaders throughout my entire career, and I can confidently share with everyone that I have not had a role at Medtronic without someone helping me get it.
Now, the door gets open, and you have to walk through it. However, I’ve never gotten a role where it was just a cold interview, and you know, sure, I got the role. No, it was always at someone else’s championship, the referral of someone else. I feel incredibly lucky for that.
I was just talking to a mentor of mine a few days ago, and she shared with me that she had never—she’s in her early sixties—had a male manager. So, it just goes to show you, and I would say at least half of my managers have been women. It just goes to show you that generational difference, how she is truly the trailblazer in much of this, and I’m sort of benefiting from a lot of it.
But I pluck things from mentors that I feel like a match with my authenticity. And I also smile at things that are incredible about them but aren’t going to apply to me because of my authentic style and personality.
Here’s a good example. A mentor I worked with but have known for two decades is probably the most authentic, warm person I’ve ever met. When she walks into a room and has a conversation with you, you feel like you’re the most important person in the room. It’s an absolute gift.
I don’t have that gift, and it’s okay. It’s okay not to have that gift. I’m a kind person, but I don’t know if I would call myself a warm person. It’s just not who I am. It’s okay.
But you pluck these things from people that you admire, from people that you love, and then it’s okay to also leave them behind. Leave things behind because if you’ve once again done that work to know who you are, you can start quickly, applying elements that you find amazing and leaving things behind that don’t fit with your authenticity.
Another woman moved really fast, took a bunch of risks, and made mistakes while she did it. But man, did she deliver results. It was like three steps forward, one step back. So, in the end, you’re going to win.
That type of approach has really impressed upon me that your team will never move faster than you. You set the pace and that’s been a true learning of mine throughout my career.
Others have taught me how to coach others. I felt incredibly lucky when I first became a people manager, being taught how to do that. Having a coach that was disciplined enough to pull me aside in the moment, not waiting six months to be like oh, remember when that happened? Let me coach you there.
He would pull me aside in a private room in the moment that he said, no, I recommend you don’t do it that way. Let me teach you. And it was just fantastic, that idea of addressing it in the moment. Have the confidence to have what people may define as conflict, but it’s just coaching.
You have to develop your people and coach your people. Most people want that directness, and they want immediate feedback. So, that type of stuff has just been absolutely transformational for me in my career. I feel very fortunate at Medtronic to have had such wonderful leaders and mentors to learn from.
Sharon Ehrlich: You said something, Alex, that I think is really important. I have mentioned this in workshops and coaching sessions, and you confirmed it here.
Moving forward in your career without having sponsors and mentors is going to be a very long slog. It’s very difficult to do it. And often, when I’m working with younger women, so mid-career women, I see that they don’t understand the importance of having those types of people in their lives.
Sometimes we strategize and put together a plan on if your organization does not have a structured mentoring program —which some of them do, and some of them are great, and some of them are very performative and don’t really have a lot of impact—who can you identify as someone that you trust and that you admire who could potentially be a mentor?
You just have to ask. Sponsorship is different because those relationships develop from trust. People need to understand who you are. They have to know, like, and trust you and be willing to put a little bit of their skin on the line to talk about you when you’re not in the room.
Mentor relationships can be nurtured and developed into sponsoring relationships. I wanted to ask a question about your younger self. You have a lot of crystallized intelligence now because you’ve been in the business a long time. You have a lot of lived experience, a lot of professional experience. What would you say to the younger Alex if you could give yourself advice?
Alex Gaudiani: Let me start with vulnerably sharing with all of you that I have a Post-it note right here next to me. And this Post-it note says, I am loved, and I am worthy even if I fail.
I put it there because, through one of my coaching experiences, we uncovered that based on some of my upbringing, based on some of the pressure that I would put on myself, there was a very significant, not fear of failure necessarily, but just felt like I had to put my head down, do the work and that’ll be enough, right? Or is it enough?
I have this here to remind me every single day in my work that perfection is the enemy of progress, and that failure is part of being a leader. And that’s okay. That’s where some of my framework around being almost confident is. Be confident in your failure, be confident in your vulnerability.
I’ll share with you guys a funny story. There were many times in my upbringing when I would, let’s say, get a 98% on a test, and my parents were so supportive and congratulatory. But the very fast second question would be, well, what happened to the other 2%? What are you going to do about it?
You know, you sort of accumulate this, like, oh, gosh, okay, it’s not good enough. It’s not good enough. It’s not good enough. And this is exactly within the realm of this conversation of imposter syndrome.
But this reminder of everything’s going to be all right, you’re going to be loved, you’re worthy, it’s good, like, learn from it, move on.
And that’s the second thing. Actually, I would probably tell my younger self, don’t dwell on things. Earlier in my career, particularly when I became a first-time people manager, suddenly the 90-10 of your role switches, where 90% of your time, when you don’t manage people is your own work and your own responsibility, that switches to basically, like, 90% of managing people.
So, I would drive home and dwell on a conversation I had with one of my direct reports for an hour. Did I handle that right? Did I answer that question right? Did I set the tone right? Are they going to quit? Second guessing yourself?
At this point, though, I’ve really moved past that. If I dwell on anything, it’s for the purpose of learning so I can wake up the next day and use it confidently to add to my outward approach.
And then, finally, I think I would tell myself there is an element of knowing when to stand up and knowing when to stand down. I do think that there’s an element in our culture, supported by social media, we could make lots of claims, but there’s this element of, like, everyone’s opinion is super important and must be shared at all times, at every moment.
I think that’s just not the case in the corporate world. We must make decisions together and in alignment. There are times to use your voice and stand up for what you believe in and your values, or if you really feel strongly about something, it’s okay to not share your opinion on occasion; it’s okay to stand down.
That’s some feedback and mentorship I’ve had with many of my younger mentees. They feel that their job is to always share their opinions, and I’ve tried to coach them. It’s not that your opinion is not important—it’s just that everyone else’s is, too. So, let’s listen first.
You know, there’s a time to listen and a time to talk. So that’s why I share, time to stand up and stand down. And that type of, you know, balance with, particularly when you’re working with lots of other functional vice presidents and leaders, I think is a really good thing because then you get to the best possible decision and solution to problems.
Sharon Ehrlich: It’s hard to believe, but we’ve actually come to the end of our conversation. Alex. So, I really want to thank you for being here, particularly knowing you got home at 03:00 in the morning.
I have to say that this was extremely valuable and a masterclass, and this is the whole goal of these live events. This was a mentoring session that we could give all of our viewers. So, I’m delighted that you were able to spend some time with me and with everyone else.
Thank you. For everybody who’s joined in for the live event and for those who are listening to the replay, I’d like to thank you as well.
Alex Gaudiani: Absolutely. Thank you so much, Sharon, a privilege to be with you.
Sharon Ehrlich: Thanks for listening today. This is your time. Give yourself permission to reclaim what’s important to you and be who you want to be. If you’re getting value from this podcast, please subscribe, share it, or write a review and connect with me on livingwhileleading.com or on LinkedIn. And don’t forget to tune in next week.
